Agave nectar combined with agave tequila and vodka, what’s not to like about that? Those have to be some of my favorite things.

That kind of mixture also reminds of my mostly misspent youth. Whenever my parents threw parties at home, they would open up the liquor cabinet and line up all the bottles along a wall on a narrow table so their guests could help themselves. Well, 10-15 people drinking all afternoon left about 20-30 glasses partially full of all sorts of lethal combinations of hooch and mixes and cigarette ashes.

I would help my parents out (and along the way myself) by bringing the used glasses from the living room into the kitchen and rinsing them. Of course, along the way, I would consume whatever disgusting dregs were left in most of those glasses. Thus, I would get an absurd amalgamation of alcohol that would make a Long Island Iced Tea look tame. There was rum, tequila, brandy, gin, vodka, scotch and cherry liqueur and God only knows what else. Now, mind you that at that time I was barely a teenager and probably weighed just under 100 pounds dripping wet. On top of that, my drinking experience up to that point consisted of a couple of swigs of sneaked beer here and there. Needless to say, I was really looking forward to one hell of a first time experience.

After downing the remnants of about a dozen glasses, I began to feel all warm and fuzzy and happy and came to the childish conclusion that if a dozen glasses made me feel that good a dozen more would make me ecstatic. So I went scurrying about the house picking up all the stray glasses I could find and gulped them down when no one was looking. Besides mixing the unmixable, I was speed drinking and really didn’t give it much thought until…. There I was standing at the kitchen sink rinsing glasses and beginning to feel way more warmer and way more fuzzier than before. Along with the warm fuzzies came an unfocused happiness and a bit of dizziness just like I got on a merry go round.

I remember thinking this is pretty cool, I like this, and was settling into feeling just about pleasantly over the top for an idiot kid my age and just forming the soon to be ill gotten conclusion that this must be why people drink when my stomach rumbled like an earthquake with a magnitude 1 on the Richter scale. That was weird! That never happened before. Maybe I just need to burp or fart or something?!? The merry go round began picking up speed and I fantasized what it must feel like to be a dog in a mini-van rolling down the highway with its head sticking out the window, tongue rolling around in the wind, eyes watering furiously and tail wagging faster than any metronome has ever gone. God this was great.

That merry go round began moving up and down as well as round and round and that added a really cool 3rd dimension to an otherwise placid ride. Man, this is really nice, I thought, I can’t wait for the next party so I can do this all over and feel this good again. But that wasn’t the end of the ride, the ride was just beginning.

My stomach rumbled again but this time it was more like a magnitude 3. Now that really shook me up both literally and figuratively. I lurched back from the kitchen sink, grabbed my stomach and looked in the general direction of my belly button fully expecting it to explode and producing an Alien. The rumbling ebbed away just as the merry go round turned into a roller coaster. I hated roller coasters! I started to sweat. My vision blurred. The rumbling started again but this time it was definitely a magnitude 8. Right about that time both my volcanoes exploded. In glorious unison both my mouth and my butt expelled everything they contained in two opposite directions with a force reminiscent of Mount Vesuvius and Mount St. Helens. Fortunately, since I had pants on they caught most all of what came out that end. Unfortunately, the Exorcist style projectile vomit that came out of my mouth met with no such boundary and I sprayed the kitchen with stinky globs of stinky globs. It was just at that moment that my Grandmother walked into the kitchen.

Thank God it was my Grandmother and not my Mom or Dad as there would have been a serious whooping. I do believe she knew what happened but all she said was “my, my you must have the stomach flu”. I nodded weakly in agreement as she walked me into the bathroom and helped me regain some modest modicum of my dignity. And that my friends was my first encounter with mixed drinks.

 

Now let’s check out this Mariposa Agave Nectar Liqueur. It is a mixture, and way more friendly than the mixtures I described above of, agave nectar, 100% agave tequila and premium vodka. It is pale gold in a clear bottle and looks a lot like tequila, but as we all know, looks can certainly be deceiving. To ramp this up a notch or two they add rose oil and gardenia. Just from the list of ingredients (agave liqueur being a natural sweetener) I’m guessing this is targeted to be a mixologist’s best friend and most likely used as a flavor enhancer in any number of cocktails old and new.

Straight out of the bottle its nose is laced with the previously cited rose oil and gardenia followed by citrus notes and backed by the unmistakable tickle of Tequila. It is sweet and fruity with a further hint of peach and might actually make a great perfume. On the palate it is medium body with a sweet honey forward followed by peach, orange and grapefruit notes. There is the slightest hint of Tequila and Vodka in the distant background. It is very tame and plays nice with the tongue. The finish is smooth and sweet. At around $24.99 for a 750 ml bottle, this Agave Nectar Liqueur is sure to find its way onto every mixologist’s shelf. Check out a few options here.

By George Brozowski